A Mental Hurricane

I know Hurricane Issac is making landfall tonight off the Gulf of Mexico into the same path as Katrina, and it’s a scary time for a lot of them.

As for me, I feel like I’m in the middle of a mental one. The eye of the storm hasn’t hit me, but I’m hoping I’ll find it soon. I know this storm isn’t going to go away like a typical storm, and a hurricane fits as there is an eye in the middle of it – Its the reprieve, giving us time to gather our strength before we deal with the storm again.

There is so much going on around me and I’m just trying to sort it all out.

Ankle injury and needing to deal with physical therapy, a childhood friend’s mom is dying from cancer (whom I know very well), both children going to school in a week (my youngest’s first time), transitioning to a new church, and then my husband’s blindness is progressing faster than I would have liked. In the midst of all of this, I’m struggling to get this depression I’ve been fighting under control.

This morning I just wanted to hide in bed and leave it for another day to deal with.  But I remembered – I have to deal with it sometime.

Oh, God… I took a long deep breath, trying to keep my emotions from taking control. It was a hard day for me. My kids saw I was struggling to keep myself sane. My daughter asked if it was my boot that was bothering me. My podiatrist has me wearing a boot to protect the injured ankle until I can start therapy. It does hinder and make life hard, but with everything going on in my head, that was just another ball of yarn to tackle. “No… I’m just overwhelmed with everything right now. I don’t have a good job right now, and I don’t know whats going to happen when Daddy can’t work anymore.”

Out of her mouth came my own wisdom back at me – “Mommy, stop worrying about the future. Think about today, okay?”  Out of the mouth of babes. I had to smile. God used my little girl to remind me of the most of important thing I need to do.

I also had to remember that I’m not the only one going through a hurricane.

We all experience it differently, just like those bracing the Category One hurricane Issac right now. It is stronger in some parts of the storm, and others is not as strong. Some people will just get the outskirts of the storm, and others will be caught in it’s direct path.  Parts of the storm can have a harder effect to things. The rain could just get things wet, but what really causes damage in some places-its the wind. It can also be the other way around. Life is the same way.

A friend of mine sent me an encouraging message today, reminding that God WILL provide. He has promised it over and over.  I have heard the message over and over, and sometimes its good to have a reminder.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11

 

 

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About coffeenut79

I am a mother to two CODAs, and if you know what I mean by that, than you would know I am deaf. I am an artist in many ways, and writing is one of the mediums I love working in. View all posts by coffeenut79

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